The two natures; PART 2
Jacob, he was a son of Abraham. The genealogies list it like this, The God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. The crazy thing here is Jacob was not the first born. He was not the one to be listed in that line, it should say Abraham, Isaac and Esau.
But something happened.
Esau sold his birthright to Jacob. There are a couple things that could trip us up here. Can a birthright be sold? Aren’t you born into it? Is it even tangible?
Yes, yes and yes.
As I said previously about Esau, The birth right that he sold was not only about a parental blessing it was about taking the word of God at face value. But this is about the nature of Jacob…
Jacob was supplanter, he schemed he lied, and he deceived. So how did one like this ever get the blessing of God that would bring about the redemption of mankind?
After Esau sold his birthright, later Jacob tricked his father and lied to him-with the help of his mother; from that lie Jacob received the blessing due to the first born. This blessing wasn’t just about saying something nice about the first son, by receiving that blessing Jacob literally became as the first born.
After this he fled and married Leah and then Rachel. He had twelve sons. He later left his father in law and after some turbulent affairs came to a place where he was going to meet Esau. Jacob hangs here in a place of fear and uncertainty. His nature flares up again, he attempts to appease his brothers perceived anger by sending gifts.
And then something changes…
In Genesis 32:24
“…and then Jacob was left alone; and a Man wrestled with him until the breaking of the day. 25Now when he saw that he-the man-did not prevail against him-Jacob, He touched the socket of his hip; and the socket of Jacobs hip was out of joint as he wrestled with him. 26And He said, ‘let me go, for the day breaks.’ But he said ‘I will not let you go unless you bless me!’…” In the following versus the angel asks him his name and then renames him “ISRAEL” which meaning “God prevails”
Jacob stepped into something.
Despite his nature of deceit he grabbed hold of God and would not let go until God blessed him. Even after being wounded by God he still held on and said “I will not let go.” Within us as believers in God and His son Jesus we have these natures in us. They both fall grossly short of God; proving our need.
There are times, moments of destiny if you will, when we step into a moment so divine we must tread lightly and violently. “For heaven suffers violence and the violent take it by force.” Jacob grabbed hold of heaven with violence and even after being physically struck and afflicted he would not let go. We have to have that same quality in ourselves. Esau forsook that covenant for food. Jacob held onto it even in the face of physical affliction.
The natures we have in us will either bring us to a place of raw abandonment and leaning on God or to the destruction of our souls and separation from Him.
Jacob held true to who God and pursued the Lords blessing over his life and became the one from whom the 12 patriarchs came. He gave birth to 12 pillars of which the world’s destiny would be forever linked to...
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Saturday, August 8, 2009
flowers in the desert
I have been in a real place of breaking recently, I don’t mean the “ow, that hurts stop poking me” I mean like the “AHHHHHHHH” flesh being pulled back and nailed to a wooden plank as your heart is plucked out and crushed until you bleed love-kind of breaking. Simply said, it has been great. No I’m not being sarcastic; in all honestly it has been amazing. How? Think of childbirth, a lot of pain and screaming and agony but there is definitely a joy in the process that something is changing and in the middle of all that discomfort there is the thought, “something is about to be born.”
That is where I am at, something is about to be born. Despite the ill fated nights of my clandestineness, where I was hiding beneath sheets of flesh trying to flesh out that ghastly nature of fleshly fleshiness; I have reached the point of having true joy in my position.
Recently I was rather taken aback by a simple but powerful encouragement via YouTube. In said encouragement, this dude was talking about “callings” and where people are at how to know what God has for you, said dude…said, “it isn’t about your ‘calling’ so to speak but rather what God has for you where you are now, you have to take it one day at a time and give yourself to the season you’re in now without living in the future that doesn’t exist yet. Find what you can and want to do know and run after it with the release of God.”
Too often we pass by what god has for us now by wasting our imagination and focus on what he will give us in the future. Today I know God has something for me, I just have to spend time with him so I know how to listen to what that is. This sounds simple and matter-of-fact-ish, but the truth is “it ain’t that easy.”
To love God is to pursue God and to pursue God means an active zeal in our hearts to push ourselves-through his grace-toward the ever so misquoted “prize.” That prize is Jesus himself. Everything else comes secondary to Him; Every ministry, Person and whatever half cocked Greek reasoned, self justified argument you could bring to deliver the contrary: in short lads and lass’, Jesus is the ultimate trump card.
So with this new place of broken joy, I am finding the desert to be a far more fruitful place than the dark soil of life’s little lessons. I don’t do little, I do big and I mean BIG. I know something is being born because I feel in my soul the pangs that it is taking to bring it forth.
All this is simple I know, I detest simple, useless diatribe aimed at reminding us that we are going to be ok and we are wrong for thinking otherwise. Are we wrong to think otherwise?
YES
But that is not the point, point is we live in a state of grace where it is not of works, and we are not debtors to the law.
It is way better this way, trust me.
So with a simple page or two of my ranting that seems so light hearted, I am conveying in part, 6 months of churning and tears and often times cuss filled frustrations at life and my circumstances, wanting more of God but knowing I was letting myself get in the way. Nights where my sleep was scattered, my heart more weighty than black hole and days of despair, destitution and bitter bitter, bitter words of a man that is long dead, “Though He slay me, yet I will trust Him.”
Ladies and men of the Gentle…hearts, He is faithful to fulfill what he promised. So with that, “keep on keepin on” and don’t wait for the future, make a Wave now, make it so big it knocks people over and leaves others sitting dumbfounded wanting to make one to.
If you want it bad enough, be ready to wear the sackcloth and ashes before you get the mantle and miracles.
Broken by grace, consumed by faith
Levi
That is where I am at, something is about to be born. Despite the ill fated nights of my clandestineness, where I was hiding beneath sheets of flesh trying to flesh out that ghastly nature of fleshly fleshiness; I have reached the point of having true joy in my position.
Recently I was rather taken aback by a simple but powerful encouragement via YouTube. In said encouragement, this dude was talking about “callings” and where people are at how to know what God has for you, said dude…said, “it isn’t about your ‘calling’ so to speak but rather what God has for you where you are now, you have to take it one day at a time and give yourself to the season you’re in now without living in the future that doesn’t exist yet. Find what you can and want to do know and run after it with the release of God.”
Too often we pass by what god has for us now by wasting our imagination and focus on what he will give us in the future. Today I know God has something for me, I just have to spend time with him so I know how to listen to what that is. This sounds simple and matter-of-fact-ish, but the truth is “it ain’t that easy.”
To love God is to pursue God and to pursue God means an active zeal in our hearts to push ourselves-through his grace-toward the ever so misquoted “prize.” That prize is Jesus himself. Everything else comes secondary to Him; Every ministry, Person and whatever half cocked Greek reasoned, self justified argument you could bring to deliver the contrary: in short lads and lass’, Jesus is the ultimate trump card.
So with this new place of broken joy, I am finding the desert to be a far more fruitful place than the dark soil of life’s little lessons. I don’t do little, I do big and I mean BIG. I know something is being born because I feel in my soul the pangs that it is taking to bring it forth.
All this is simple I know, I detest simple, useless diatribe aimed at reminding us that we are going to be ok and we are wrong for thinking otherwise. Are we wrong to think otherwise?
YES
But that is not the point, point is we live in a state of grace where it is not of works, and we are not debtors to the law.
It is way better this way, trust me.
So with a simple page or two of my ranting that seems so light hearted, I am conveying in part, 6 months of churning and tears and often times cuss filled frustrations at life and my circumstances, wanting more of God but knowing I was letting myself get in the way. Nights where my sleep was scattered, my heart more weighty than black hole and days of despair, destitution and bitter bitter, bitter words of a man that is long dead, “Though He slay me, yet I will trust Him.”
Ladies and men of the Gentle…hearts, He is faithful to fulfill what he promised. So with that, “keep on keepin on” and don’t wait for the future, make a Wave now, make it so big it knocks people over and leaves others sitting dumbfounded wanting to make one to.
If you want it bad enough, be ready to wear the sackcloth and ashes before you get the mantle and miracles.
Broken by grace, consumed by faith
Levi
Tuesday, July 21, 2009
prayer and suffering
There is an answer to prayer that is not the pretty little breeze of blessing; the beautiful conquering of some ill bred foe; the joy of a heart saved from self destruction. There is an answer which is ugly and grotesque, rank and flail-worthy; where screaming and kicking is the song and rhythm of your life. When you ask to have the heart of God: when you say you want to love more deeply than anything you have seen, to love the broken and downtrodden; side by side to the rich man; the pockets of whom are too swollen for him to know what it feels like to fall on his rump.
This answer comes in the complete destruction of oneself, the slow decay of every foundation and solid footing. The breaking of a man is one of the ugliest things I have ever seen in my life. Not to be hasty and judge the ugly things of no sure use, for they are. Before you build you have to lay waste, before you plant you have to plow.
It is a bitter thing to willingly subject oneself in a joining to the heart of God. Whoever says such a thing is a constant joy is a liar and a thief. The former for they cannot have the heart of God and not know the sorrow that is there, joy-yes-but sorrow also. The latter because such a damned fool is stealing truth from the hearts of honest people.
This answer comes in the complete destruction of oneself, the slow decay of every foundation and solid footing. The breaking of a man is one of the ugliest things I have ever seen in my life. Not to be hasty and judge the ugly things of no sure use, for they are. Before you build you have to lay waste, before you plant you have to plow.
It is a bitter thing to willingly subject oneself in a joining to the heart of God. Whoever says such a thing is a constant joy is a liar and a thief. The former for they cannot have the heart of God and not know the sorrow that is there, joy-yes-but sorrow also. The latter because such a damned fool is stealing truth from the hearts of honest people.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
I
Broken concrete beneath my bleeding feet
You said stand
So here I am bleeding to death
Beneath bright skies that should stir joy
But inside this rubble laced coffin
I am suffocating
I could have died a thousand other places
With a bit more dignity
With some semblance of sober pride
But I have become a mockery
Will you let the righteous be forsaken?
CERTAINLY NOT
So come then
Swiftly, for I am no sparrow
I am falling without wings
Into a pit of darkness
Like death’s gaping mouth
Spreading to swallow the living
I will not waver
For you are sure to defend your name
You said stand
So here I am bleeding to death
Beneath bright skies that should stir joy
But inside this rubble laced coffin
I am suffocating
I could have died a thousand other places
With a bit more dignity
With some semblance of sober pride
But I have become a mockery
Will you let the righteous be forsaken?
CERTAINLY NOT
So come then
Swiftly, for I am no sparrow
I am falling without wings
Into a pit of darkness
Like death’s gaping mouth
Spreading to swallow the living
I will not waver
For you are sure to defend your name
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Valued Friends and family alike:
These letters are of no new insight to you. Once again I am seeking anyone willing to partner with me in what the Lord has set in my heart.
For those who don’t know where I have been, I am living in Springfield, Illinois working to help build a house of prayer and going to school fulltime. In the past year I have been working, doing school and part time prayer room staff. All year was a balancing act and by the grace of God I made it through.
However, this year I do not wish to repeat walking such a delicate and treacherous line. I want to go fulltime staff and be free to pursue other ministry needs the lord has laid on my heart. One is planting a campus church as an off branch of the house of prayer here. I need time to do this and I cannot take on anything else unless my work schedule is reduced. In addition to all of this I will be helping to form and teach an internship in the spring.
Since I have been here we have seen breakthrough in many areas. The mandate for this prayer room is governmental intercession. Two main examples of breakthrough would be the racial reconciliation meetings for the 1908 race riots. After the walks and meetings were completed, out of nowhere the medical community and the mayor released a public apology for the mistreatment of blacks during those riots. Again, last fall we began to pray for corrupt officials to be exposed and their sin to be made bare, shortly after the governor was impeached and continuing even to this moment many scandals are coming to light in Illinois politics.
Any contribution will give me leeway to run harder and give more time to the task at hand, to contribute not just to a house of prayer but a place where the broken and downtrodden can come and receive healing. To plant and raise up a campus church that will be meeting needs of students and bringing light to a world of muddled humanistic academia. And to prepare myself and others for the next mass student missions movement.
Any contribution, even 5 or 10 dollars a month will give me more time in the prayer room and to establish the campus ministry. I am seeking consistent monthly partners in prayer and financial support.
Will you consider partnering with me to fulfill what God has set in my heart?
All donations are tax deductible (with the exception of online donations through paypal) Please leave the “for” line blank. You may donate online through paypal at www.leviferguson.blogspot.com
Please make checks payable to: IHOP springfield contributions may be sent to- ATTN: LEVI FERGUSON 624 south 4th st. Springfield, Il 62703
Broken by grace, consumed by faith,
Levi Ferguson.
These letters are of no new insight to you. Once again I am seeking anyone willing to partner with me in what the Lord has set in my heart.
For those who don’t know where I have been, I am living in Springfield, Illinois working to help build a house of prayer and going to school fulltime. In the past year I have been working, doing school and part time prayer room staff. All year was a balancing act and by the grace of God I made it through.
However, this year I do not wish to repeat walking such a delicate and treacherous line. I want to go fulltime staff and be free to pursue other ministry needs the lord has laid on my heart. One is planting a campus church as an off branch of the house of prayer here. I need time to do this and I cannot take on anything else unless my work schedule is reduced. In addition to all of this I will be helping to form and teach an internship in the spring.
Since I have been here we have seen breakthrough in many areas. The mandate for this prayer room is governmental intercession. Two main examples of breakthrough would be the racial reconciliation meetings for the 1908 race riots. After the walks and meetings were completed, out of nowhere the medical community and the mayor released a public apology for the mistreatment of blacks during those riots. Again, last fall we began to pray for corrupt officials to be exposed and their sin to be made bare, shortly after the governor was impeached and continuing even to this moment many scandals are coming to light in Illinois politics.
Any contribution will give me leeway to run harder and give more time to the task at hand, to contribute not just to a house of prayer but a place where the broken and downtrodden can come and receive healing. To plant and raise up a campus church that will be meeting needs of students and bringing light to a world of muddled humanistic academia. And to prepare myself and others for the next mass student missions movement.
Any contribution, even 5 or 10 dollars a month will give me more time in the prayer room and to establish the campus ministry. I am seeking consistent monthly partners in prayer and financial support.
Will you consider partnering with me to fulfill what God has set in my heart?
All donations are tax deductible (with the exception of online donations through paypal) Please leave the “for” line blank. You may donate online through paypal at www.leviferguson.blogspot.com
Please make checks payable to: IHOP springfield contributions may be sent to- ATTN: LEVI FERGUSON 624 south 4th st. Springfield, Il 62703
Broken by grace, consumed by faith,
Levi Ferguson.
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Thursday, June 11, 2009
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